News travels fast, doesn’t it?
I had but merely whispered the words into The Universe on Saturday and BOOM! Just like when I was outed on my Conservative Catholic College Campus — the news spread like wild fire. A shockingly similar response, too. “We’ve known for a while.” OK well, fuck you.
Yes yes, the end of an era. Blah blah blah. What you might have forgotten is that I’ve had an entire year to fully come to terms with the fact that MY LEGACY is gonna be whittled down to a few last classes in the fucking Country Mart parking lot. Next Sat, the eyes of every Karen in Marin County will dart my direction as I scream profanities, use the tent poles to perform a striptease, hang up my mic pack, and step off — oh wait, there’s not podium because we’re in a *say it with me* FUCKING PARKING LOT. A sad existence, indeed.
How does this effect you? It doesn’t. This is not goodbye LUIGICYCLE. I’ll still see you twice a week over these godforsaken screens, in our own little fucked up nightmare world, unshackled by corporate America, free to perform and wear a breast plate as I so choose. I’m like herpes. You’ll never get rid of me.
; )